OptiDream Third-Generation 3Gen Original Dream Machine 100+ Stimuli & More by Devon Halliday

Sorted: Most Helpful to Least Helpful

★★★★★

Absolutely a must-have. I was an early investor of their kickstarter and now I’ve just bought the third generation model. I wouldn’t be surprised if everyone in America had one of these in two years. You will wonder how you ever could stand sleeping before. I was able to quit my job and become a full-time tournament gamer. My hands move faster than my brain now. Sometimes I’ll see them tapping out commands when I’m just sitting in the kitchen or at the airport or something. Highly highly recommend. Their new slogan is cheesy as hell but seriously, don’t sleep on this.

★★★★★

Honestly pretty cool. I didn’t want my dreams to affect my work-life balance so I decided to do something totally random and take flute lessons. Literally had never touched a flute in my entire real life, but after three weeks of dreams I picked one up and could play along to any song on the radio. It’s a great party trick, and as a bonus your friends will be like, I didn’t know you played flute! and from then on they’ll think you’re full of hidden multitudes. Not sure what I’m going to use it for next, though there’s a social option that intrigues me. Definitely worth buying, though maybe get one of the older models or wait for the price to go down? Thanks OptiDream for providing a free machine in exchange for an honest review.

★★★★☆

I’m going to give this product 4 stars because it takes some getting used to, but I’ve had it three months now and I have to admit it’s having a great effect. I got it on the recommendation of my boss because for a while my sales numbers had been lower than the rest of the team, and he sort of suggested this as an alternative to getting fired. Under the Professional category you can pick Sales—I’m amazed how many preset stimuli this thing has—and as the user manual says, you really will dream about making sales calls every night. Which I actually found kind of unnerving for a while. There I’d be in an ordinary dream, like sitting at a classroom desk having forgotten to do my homework, when the teacher comes down the aisle holding a cordless phone and saying, Someone’s on the line for you. And I pick it up and it’s Kathy from Minnesota saying that the replacement unit we sent after the first one was broken is also broken, and what the hell kind of company is this anyway, etc. Which is helpful, genuinely, and I appreciate the extra practice. But the trouble is I can’t go anywhere in my dreams without the sales calls following me. Getting chased by a monster? Phone rings in the creepy abandoned house: it’s a sales call. Swerving all over the road: sales call via the car’s Bluetooth. Naked at the top of a stairwell: payphone rings, it’s a sales call. Trying to pay but my credit card keeps getting declined, and when I call them to verify my identity: it’s a sales call. I kind of wish there was a setting where you could dial the dreams down to 50% or something without having to all the way unplug. But I mean it works, my sales numbers have been improving and yesterday I had the highest of the whole team. Guess I’ll keep this going for a while until my boss tells me I’m off probation and can dream about something else, like flying.

★★★★★

have had some absolutely insane sex dreams w this thing. enough said

★★★★☆

Taking off one star because I wish I could remember the dreams. I never remember my dreams and I thought this would help. But no, you get to choose your dreams but you don’t get to see them play out. I picked Relationship Maintenance because things w/ my partner had been kind of rocky for a while. I have no idea what’s happening in those dreams but my partner loves OptiDream, she says I should give them 5 stars. She says I’m like a different person. I find myself standing in line to buy flowers sometimes and I don’t know why. Or she’ll be complaining about her coworkers and out of nowhere I’m offering up these brilliant insights about how their insecurities about their own work performance lead them to lash out at her. Or now when one of my coworkers, who I used to have a mild crush on, when she catches my eye I feel kind of nauseous and suddenly I’m in the hallway headed somewhere else. Don’t get me wrong, it works. I just wish I knew what “it” was.

★☆☆☆☆

i hate this. the existence of this technology offends me on every possible level. who the fuck wants to dream about work while they’re asleep. capitalism get off my back

★★★★★

I used to have terrible nightmares about a trauma from my past that I won’t get into here. My therapist recommended I try OptiDream. Now in all my dreams I’m sitting in a large conference room where everyone is talking at the same volume and no one ever turns to me or asks my opinion. I think this option is supposed to be for building confidence but I just sit there. The nightmares can’t get me when I’m in the conference room. No one comes in or out and I just sit there with the rest of the committee with my plastic cup of water and my briefcase and I listen to the hum, and eventually I wake up.

★★★★★

Really really pleased with this product. My productivity at the office has skyrocketed because whenever there’s a bug in the code I just spend my dream time debugging it, and then I’m free to spend my actual work hours actually building things. Haven’t noticed any side effects, I’m more focused than ever. Sometimes when I close my eyes I see code, even when I’m not hooked up, but I think that was true before OptiDream too.

★☆☆☆☆

there should be security features!!! my parents bought me this so i could get better at soccer because i’m hoping for a full ride. so night after night i’m dreaming about penalty shots and midfield offense until suddenly: clowns. everywhere i go there are clowns. putting on jerseys and jogging out on the field, filling the bleachers, selling freaky balloon animals at the concession stand. turns out my little sister changed the stimulus to clowns as a prank. nice one sis. why the fuck isn’t there some protection against this like 2 factor authentication or something. why the fuck is clowns even an option. i even unhooked from the machine but the clowns kept coming.

★★★★★

Feels like I have twice as much day, love it! I was worried initially that messing with my dreams might have weird side effects, because aren’t dreams supposed to be how we process the day and prepare for threats or whatever it is? But I guess scientists never did come down on what dreams are good for and now with OptiDream they’re good for everything! I’ve learned to shoot pool, I’ve gotten better at Spanish, I even make better jokes because the third generation has a whole social category where you can kind of rehearse conversations before they happen. My friends have never liked me more. It’s true I have noticed the occasional out-of-body effect that other reviewers have mentioned where you’ll find yourself doing something without remembering how you got there or how you got so good at it. Just like in dreams how you move from place to place without transitions. So it does get harder to tell when you’re dreaming vs. awake, but in a way I think that’s proof of how successful OptiDream is. Dreams are just more life. And more is always better, wasn’t that their original slogan?

★★★★★

Five stars for sure, only wish there were customizable stimuli. I have a highly unusual job and it’s hard for me to find a stimulus that lets me practice the skills I need. But I love the new options the third generation added and my partner and I have been having fun picking the same stimulus on the same night when we hook up and go to bed. Telling each other about our dreams has become easily the best part of our day.

★★★★★

Editing my previous review bc the third generation is great! I love the option to randomize so you dream about something different each night. Customer service was so helpful and prompt. I had originally been sent a second generation which I think was broken because no matter what setting I chose my dreams always featured Jeff Probst, reality TV show host of Survivor. I haven’t watched Survivor in 10 years, but he was there every night, narrating whatever I did. “Katherine’s taking a long time to finish that waffle,” he’d say, or “Katherine’s at the podium completely naked now but still going ahead with her speech.” It was fun the first few nights, but after a while it got pretty aggravating. I’d be trying to make it through a piano lesson and there Jeff would be, sitting on a bench just behind mine, contentedly watching and commenting on everything I did. “Katherine’s missed that chord for the third time in a row.” “Katherine sounding a little rushed on the eighth notes, trying to make up some time.” I looked online but no one else seemed to be having this problem? I got so frustrated with Jeff that my dreams devolved into me trying to kill him to keep him quiet, as he said things like “Katherine now panicking a little” and “Katherine’s attempting strangulation, will it be enough?” Sometimes I did kill him but he just came back the next night. It became a sort of first-thing routine in the dream, killing Jeff Probst. When I finally got through, the OptiDream customer service rep was so helpful and apologetic. I got a third generation model for free plus a fifty-dollar voucher towards therapy and I just had to send them back the Jeff Probst model so they could run some tests on it they said. Honestly my only complaint about the whole experience is that now every time anyone mentions Survivor I’m overtaken by homicidal urges, and I have to stand up and get a glass of water or something to calm down.

★★★★★

every night the same dream: getting out of bed to brush my teeth, doing the crossword over coffee, driving to each neighborhood along my route, sorting, distributing, there’s the house whose mailbox is always already full but I have to jam it in anyway, and when the day is over I make dinner and sit in the dark for a few hours until the dream ends. I’ve had the machine for six months now and in the beginning the dreams were less realistic, like it couldn’t quite figure out how my day fit together and which roads led to which houses. but now six months along the dreams have come to resemble my waking life so perfectly that I can’t always tell the difference. or more is that I forget to try to tell the difference or that there’s a difference to look for in the first place. I just slide through time like a hockey puck in a physics problem where there is no friction and the ice goes on forever. I was clinically depressed before optidream but now I mostly feel fine. the only real difference is that in the dreams there are no weekends. so when I wake up and there’s nothing for me to do with myself I know that I’m awake.

★★☆☆☆

Used it for a month & then stopped because I got tired of having to pick something to work on every night. I make enough decisions over the course of a day, I don’t need to decide how I spend my sleep. Except it turns out I’m not sure you can really stop? Since I’ve unhooked I keep having dreams where various instructors chase me down the street or interrupt my conversations asking to teach me things. Cross-stitching, forehands, butterfly stroke. They’re easy to brush off but I’m not sure how they’re getting in? I’ve unplugged the machine and everything.

★☆☆☆☆

not as good as remhack and costs more

★☆☆☆☆

i swear i saw an expose about the adverse side effects in the NYT but i can’t find it now?? sketch

★★★★★

but at some point in every dream I end up scraping my teeth out of my mouth

★★★★★

Love it!! You will not regret

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